I nearly forgot there was a red carpet tonight and by the looks of what walked down it, my disinterest was completely warranted.

So Jennifer Lopez was there, looking like the love child of Faye Dunaway and Marlena Dietrich. I am guessing she looks glazed because actually moving her facial muscles is probably painful and likely out of the question. Not sure who made the necklace though I’m thinking maybe Lorraine Schwartz, Neil Lane or possibly Queens R Us, but a choker or something closer to the neckline would have been better.

In the meantime, Olivia Wilde (who was there why, exactly?) wore a choker when she should have had something pendant-y or at least longer to go with her cleavage and the v-neck on her dress.

Other than that, there were some earrings (nothing fab that I could see), an ugly choker worn by Jennifer Lawrence that competed with her dress and boobs. As for boobs and red carpet, there were lots and lots and lots of them. Once again, repeat after me: breasts are not accessories, no matter how much you paid for them.

The silver plated lining: at least it gets easier every year to write about this.