No, I’m not expecting the skies to open and shine down on gorgeous jewels (though they may yet stay open and rainy after the torrential downpours LA has seen over the past few days).

But I’ll be watching the Oscars red carpet. I’ll be feeling jaded in advance. Just, you know, not to get my hopes up. As my mother used to say, “Don’t expect and you won’t be disappointed.” If all the lead-up awards are any indication, water isn’t the only drought LA is experiencing.

Though I’d like to direct you to my friend Jessica Radloff’s coverage. Jessica interviews celebs for Glamour, and also appears as a guest host on The Talk, as well as doing a Dancing With the Stars pre-show for ABC.com. She asks the kind of questions you wish most interviewers would (and you’d probably like to in her shoes) and her stories are always quirky, fun and surprising.

If the jewel wasteland gets you down, head for Jess. She is witty and just plain fun to read. She will be live tweeting the Elton John Oscar party tonight; look for @JRadloff on Twitter.