In the wasteland that is now the annual global entertainment awards season, Helen Mirren could be relied upon for on point glamour and stunning jewellery. Sad to say, Ms. Mirren is no long my girl crush when it comes to accessorizing. Strutting the red carpet at last night’s BAFTA ceremony in London (akin to the Oscars in terms of prestige in the UK), she showed up wearing sad anemic earrings. And pink hair. Even the dress was kind of mother of the bride.

Why, Helen, why?

The dyed locks matched her makeup and nails, but when 67-year-old Helen Mirren is emulating 28-year-oldKaty Perry, it is to weep. If a sex tape is next, I may have to cancel my Internet connection.

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